Never Think I Didn't Love You
by SunKissed69
Summary: Draco and Harry have hated eachother for years. In their 7th year, things change and they fall in love. But they also get something even greater than the gift of love: the gift of life. Mpreg


"Stupid little mudblood, tripping me like that!" Draco sneered, recollecting his books he had dropped, standing up, and shoving his way past the trio into the Potions' classroom.  
  
"Slimy git, I hate that boy!" said Hermione, as her, Harry and Ron walked into what they considered Hell. Ron agreed with Hermione, which brought them into a conversation about all the bad points of Malfoy, all the while Harry was thinking. Draco Malfoy had grown to a height of about 6', towering over most at Hogwarts. He spiked his platinum blonde locks now, instead of slicking them back. Years of Quidditch training toned and firmed his pale, milky body to perfection. Besides Harry, he was the best- looking guy at Hogwarts. Harry had grown to over 6', while his naturally unruly hair only looked sexy now, and due to a Quidditch accident, Madame Pomfrey had fixed his eyesight, and so he ditched the glasses leaving his emerald eyes even more intense than usual.  
  
Aside from Harry now being extremely good-looking, something else had changed. He pondered his sexuality. Sure, he had dated just about every girl at Hogwarts, and had a great time, but a few certain guys had caught his eye too, one now being Malfoy. He looks so sexy now, thought Harry, adding newts eyes to his potion. Ugh! I just called Malfoy sexy! He was in denial about his feelings, although he was almost positive he was in love with the blonde Slytherin. If his fellow Gryffindors ever knew of this, he would be disowned from his own house!  
  
He stared at Malfoy from across the classroom, and was startled. Malfoy was staring back, too. Then he snapped back to his cocky self and sneered, "What the hell are you looking at, Potter?"  
  
In the Great Hall that night, Harry didn't eat or talk. He just sat there and thought. He noticed Draco wasn't at dinner that night. They, him and Draco, had had a moment. He was sure the same amount of lust in Malfoy's eyes was expressed onto his own face as well, during that moment.  
  
"You okay, Harry?" Ron was now peering into Harry's eyes, obviously concerned. He gestured to the untouched plate of food in front of Harry.  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine, thanks. I just think I need to go lie down." And with that, Harry set off for Gryffindor Tower.  
  
Fuck, Harry thought, walking down the hall. Fuck, fuck, fuck! I'm in love with someone who will probably never love me back, and worse yet, even if they did, I would never be able to show my feelings! Maybe I should just-  
  
He was interrupted by the sound of sobbing. He turned the corner, extremely quietly, and was startled by what he saw. Malfoy. Malfoy huddled up against the wall, heaving out heart-wrenching sobs. His face was stained with the salty tears dripping from his eyes, which were bloodshot. One black sleeve of robe was pushed up, and Draco was holding a small, sharp knife. He pushed the blade up against the pale flesh of his forearm, and with once quick, deep breath, he slashed it across angrily. Suddenly, a deep, angry line of red intruded that porcelain, unblemished skin of his. He rotated his arm, and let the crimson drips fall to the cold stone floor. Draco still wasn't aware Harry was standing behind him. He slipped his finger over the now growing puddle of blood on the floor, and started writing a word out, in his own blood. Harry couldn't believe someone as sure as himself, as cocky, as arrogant as Draco, would do something this low. Draco, after all, had everything he wanted and even things he didn't want. His father and mother, considering he was from one of the richest wizarding families existing, spoiled him rotten. Harry looked down, and gasped. There it was, in Draco's own red blood, his name. Harry.  
  
The gasp startled Draco. He whirled around; eyes still rimmed red from crying. One word: "Potter."  
  
"Malfoy? Why the hell?"  
  
Draco just looked down, a tear slipping down his pallid cheek.  
  
"I. I just.you." Draco choked out, and in one swift movement, stood up and ran away from Harry.  
  
That night, Harry couldn't sleep. He tossed and turned in his own, four poster bed in the Gryffindor Boys' Dorm. All he could think about was Draco. He had no idea Draco was doing that to himself, and he wanted to end it. He wanted to solve Draco's pain, and make everything in that boy's world right again. He wanted to spend the rest of his life falling asleep and waking up to Draco right next to him. There was no denying it anymore; Harry loved him. He got up from the tangled gold sheets, and found his Invisibility cloak from the bottom of his trunk. He put it on, and crept out of the Tower and down to the Dungeons, where he assumed Draco would be. He knew the Slytherin password because he had been on his way to Potions when a 1st year couldn't remember it, so Goyle and Crabbe had to remind him of it.  
  
He crept inside, into the Slytherin Common Room. It was almost exactly like the Gryffindor one, except the décor was in green and silver, versus red and gold. "Now, which way is Draco's room?" Harry wondered out loud. He was being extremely careful to be silent, and he slowly inched his way to the Boys Dorm. "Lumos," he said. His wand gave off a dim light. He groped his way along until he reached a bed. He pulled off the Invisibility Cloak. He held the wand up to the unknown person's face. Draco. He looked like a perfect angel, lying there so peacefully. His normally gel-laden hair was soft from being washed, and his usually pale cheeks glowed pink. His eyelids fluttered, and he slowly opened his eyes to find Harry Potters emerald gaze fixed on his own azure one. "Harry?" Draco murmured, apparently still half asleep. "What are you doing here? What time is it?" "Shh," Harry soothed. "I'm only here because I wanted to talk to you." Draco stumbled out of bed. He was only clad in silver boxers. Harry found it extremely agonizing not to stare at the muscled chest of him. Draco didn't even notice. "What do you want, Potter?" Draco asked, more thoroughly awake now, and aware that Harry was there. Harry winced at the usage of surnames, and replied "I want to know exactly why. What you were doing." He tried again, "Why do you do that to yourself, Draco?" Draco looked semi-confused, and then beckoned with his finger for Harry to follow him out into the Common Room.  
Once they were back in the Common Room, Draco lit a fire, and they both settled into a plushy green couch. Draco held up his forearm for Harry to see in the flickering light. Harry gasped at what he saw. Long, thin fuchsia scars all over the arm contrasted with his white skin. Draco looked embarrassed, but tried to hold his head up high as he lowered his arm. "I suppose you want to know why I would inflict harm upon myself," he said, meeting Harry's eyes. "Well, I'll just be honest with you, since you supposedly care so much about this. I love you, Harry Potter, and I always have. Never think, not for one second, that I didn't love you. There wasn't a day that went by that you didn't go through my mind. I fell asleep thinking about you, dreamt about you, and woke up to start the process all over again. Ridiculing you and your little friends was all just an act. A way to be closer to you, because I knew you would never choose, on your own will, to be friends with me. So you think a Malfoy never cries, eh? I don't remember a night I haven't cried. All for you! You hated me, and since you hated me, I hated myself. The only will I had to live was you, the only thing I survived on, the only thing I looked forward to, the reason I didn't fucking kill myself was you, Harry! You and no one else! I told myself I wasn't worth living unless you thought I was. And you didn't, so I didn't either. Everyday, you glared at me. And with every glare, a little part of me died. I'm this close to falling off the edge, and I won't be coming back, so just promise me one thing, Harry. Promise me you won't be the final reason." And with that, Draco collapsed into tears. Harry sat there, speechless. Totally, utterly confused. Draco loved him, too? He never saw this coming. Finally, senses coming back to him, he inched closer to the sobbing boy.  
Harry put an arm around Draco's waist and pulled him closer. Draco leaned his head into Harry's chest and bawled. "Shh," Harry said, stroking his blonde hair. "I love you too, Draco Malfoy. I'm sorry, I'm sorry for everything hurtful I've ever said to you, every glare, every day I was a prat. I love you, and that's all that matters now." The common room was totally silent, the fire died down, and all that could be heard was Harry whispering over and over, "I'm sorry, and I love you," until both boys finally fell asleep.  
  
The next morning, Harry awoke to an unfamiliar heaviness in his arms. He glanced down, and one look at Draco's angelic face brought the memories of last night flooding back to him. He look at the clock on the fireplace, it was extremely early in the morning. It was also a Saturday, meaning no one would be up very soon. He sighed in relief. The last thing he wanted was the whole Slytherin house waking up to find Harry and Draco holding eachother. He shifted his weight slightly, causing Draco to stir awake. He opened his eyes, azure met emerald, and before Harry knew what he was doing, he leaned down and kissed the boy in his arms. It was a sweet kiss, nothing hot or steamy, just a gentle, simple kiss. Probably the best kiss either of the boys had enjoyed in their life, and that was a lot to say considering both Draco and Harry had been around. They both pulled away at the same time. Draco looked confused. Harry laughed at the adorable expression on Draco's face. "You laughing at me, Potter?" pouted Draco. "No, I'm just happy, that's all," replied Harry. "Oh, okay then," said Draco, still vaguely confused. "Come on, let's get up, Draco," coaxed Harry, standing up and taking a step towards the door. "Harry. Why can't we just lay here all day?" whined Draco, who would have preferred to stay in his new lover's arms all day, rather than mosey about the castle. "Yes, I'd rather stay here too." "So why don't we?" "Because someone could see us. We just announced our love to eachother last night. We both need to get over the shock first before we tell other people." "Shock?" "Yes, Draco, shock. You, the Slytherin Prince of Evil, and me, the Boy Who Lived. Not a likely couple to most people. I certainly didn't see it coming, and I doubt you did either. We need to ease into this slowly, okay?" "Okay." "Good, now let's go to the Great Hall. I'm famished, I haven't ate in days." "Yeah, me neither." Now Draco looked thoughtful. "What are you thinking about? You look like you want to say something." Draco blushed slightly, then mumbled something inaudible. "Draco, speak up!" "I asked if you were a virgin." Now it was Harry's turn to blush. "Actually, no, I'm not." "Oh, when and who?" "That's my business, and none of yours!" "Harry, just tell me, it's not like I'm going to go kill the person. I'm just asking out of curiosity, that's all." "You swear you won't tell anyone?" "Promise." "K. Cho Chang, in 5th year." "I see. Well, just to be fair, I lost it in 4th year, with a girl named Zoe Zimmerstiene." "Who?" "In Slytherin. Knowing your hatred for Slyths, I doubt you'd know her." "True. I'm about to keel over with hunger, so can we please go?" "Sure, just hold on a sec. Wait for me outside." Harry left while Draco walked back into the Boys Dorm. Everyone in there was still sleeping, so he quietly gathered some clean clothes and went back out into the common room to change. He left, and saw Harry sitting against the wall, looking very deep in thought. He seemed startled, as he looked up to see Draco hovering over him, holding out a hand to help him up. He grabbed the hand, and him and Draco started off for the Great Hall. They both acted like they hated eachother once they walked inside, after a quick kiss behind the great doors, of course. They finished breakfast quickly, and met up again outside the Great Hall. "So. what do you want to do?" asked Harry. "Well, I want to spend the day with you." "Of course," smiled Harry. "Arrogant today, Potter?" asked Draco, smiling too. Harry playfully hit him on the arm. "Seeing as today is a Hogsmeade day, and all of my house will be there all day, we could go to Gryffindor Tower, and do something, maybe?" "Have something in mind.?" Draco smirked. "Same thing you have in mind. I'll race you." And with that, Harry and Draco both rushed up the stairs and to the Fat Lady portrait. "Cactus spikes." The Fat Lady swung open. Draco and Harry walked into the room. They looked at eachother, suddenly unsure about what to do next. "Sure is warmer up here than in the dungeons," joked Draco, trying to lighten the situation. "Yeah. I'll bet. This is really awkward, and at the pace this is going at it'll take forever, so I'm just going to ask straight out. Do you want to make love now?" "Thought you'd never ask." Draco lied down on the fluffy burgundy couch, and Harry climbed on top of him. Draco closed the space between their lips in one passionate, hot kiss. 


End file.
